My December is always saturated with silence, hot cups of coffee, layers of comfy clothes, books, beautiful memories and imperceptible sadness. And this December is the most special one of my life. Because, this December, a new phase of my life is going to start. When I woke up this morning and glanced at the calendar in my room, I realized the life turning day has come. The day for which our middle class Asian mothers prepared us. Calendar has turned to the 10th of December, and I have to go to the parlor in half an hour.
Fog has enveloped the city, causing a hushed symphony in the atmosphere, which raised nostalgic feelings in my heart. I gaze at the luxurious encrusted red lehnga, skillfully laden with crystals and exquisite embroideries, and feel my eyes start burning and a lump of tears forming in my throat. Gazing all around the room, my eyes stop at the bookstand where my books are lying. For the last seven years, my December went reading and rereading them during the long nights of it, causing an immense pleasure to rush in my veins. But, it seems that this December will be spent reading and rereading my husband, fear encapsulates my heart about whether it will be a pleasant experience or not. Taking a deep sigh, I turned to open the window of my room to let the breeze touch my face. Breeze hit my face, carrying the scent of my home area, which caused the memories to rush in the grooves of my subconscious. The alley below settles into the patchwork of streetlight, shadow, and sound. A vendor is passing the alley and shouting loudly to sell his boiled eggs. That vendor has been passing through my alley since my childhood, so his very voice and presence are nostalgic for me. My childhood has been spent in this alley while playing, making friends, learning new things, and exploring the complex relations of the human world.
Bolting the window, I turned to my room, where I have spent ten years of my life. We resided in the joint family system just a few houses away from here. Living my adolescent years in it, planning my future, dreaming, struggling for my well-being and learning new things; that room is my friend, and the era in it is a blissful epoch which I’m leaving now. Well, the clock is ticking and I have to prepare myself. The most irritating thing about this calm month is the rushing hours of morning. Day keeps on running and running and then, night nestled the world in its soothing lullaby. I took the ornaments from my dressing and with it the scenes pulsed in my orbs when my mother bought these ornaments some ten years ago. Since then, she had started making my dowry, typical of our middle-class Asian mothers. After making the whole dowry, she set out to find my second half. And the most funny thing about it is that I haven’t met him till now. At night, during my wedding event, I will meet him, and will find out what type of person he is. Out of nowhere, a cold wind hits my being, causing uneasiness to skate through my body.
“Shanzay, are you ready? Have you packed your jewelry carefully? Time is rushing!” With a panic stricken face, my mother is trying to rebuke me. I know the fear has also encapsulated her heart, but she is struggling to subside it. Tears are also swimming in her orbs but she is trying to resist them. Hug is her and mine necessity at this time, so I stepped forward to dutifully do it. Hugging her, relief flooded in my veins and, at last, a tear found its way on my cheeks and then slid into nothingness.
“Do remember your parents are always here for you! Always try to solve your issues yourself, but for any guidance and support, do remember your parents are still residing in this world. They are here for you! You are going from this home and room, not from our lives.” Her calm voice echoed in my ears and my lips smiled on their own. This assurance and love is all I need to soothe my fearful heart. December is a cold month, but it is also a warm month because of its food, clothes and other accessories. Just like this, life is also a cold and difficult journey, which can be warming and soothing because of the fire of love, affection of loved ones and support of your comrades. Ups and downs, changes and stepping into new phases are constant in our lives, but if the support and warm hugs are also a part of our life, then these difficulties can be bearable.